asd121275 发表于 2009-10-29 20:32   全显示 1楼
从开头来看，我感觉楼主已经可以去写正统武侠了，呵呵，个人就是觉得肉戏的描写简单，依依的情节也有点老套，看来楼主在情色武侠和传统武侠之间徘徊，像依依这样的角色，很多的武侠里面都有，小弟以为还是把依依的情义什么的去掉，彻底描写成一个女淫魔什么的，不必死，继续与主人公斗什么的，四妖姬的描写也有点粗糙，以上是个人纯粹从H角度的考虑，楼主的本意尽可以继续，最后可以来个改编版什么的，红心支持
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